Phases of Knowing He Was “The One”
Jacob and I have been asked a lot about the first time we knew we found “the one.” Our answers differ.
Right now, I am sitting in a cozy Starbucks drinking hot tea, while listening to Christmas music over the speakers. Soon, Jacob will get off work and meet me here, and I’m so excited to see him, even though we stayed in the same hotel room last night, haha. He’s been traveling a lot for work within the past couple months or so. His promotion starts in January, so they have him covering various hospitals in different states. He’s been in Chicago, IL, Ann Arbor, MI, Rockford, IL, West Bend, WI, Arlington Heights, IL, the list goes on.. Unfortunately.
I’m trying not to be selfish about it, but I miss him! We did long-distance for a majority of our relationship, and I guess it’s still not over!
But distance makes the heart grow fonder, right? Actually, I think it’s impossible to get any “fonder” of him.
Okay, just wanted to vent! Now, I’m going to share some tidbits of our relationship and how I knew he was “the one.”
Jacob and I met each other in passing at a party in February, 2014. It was now April, and I was at an ISU baseball game with some of my friends. I saw this suuuuuper cute right fielder running in at the end of the inning. I HAD to find out who the heck he was. I looked him up on the roster and followed him on Twitter. He direct-messaged (Yep, guys, sometimes DM’ing a girl works!) me on April 3rd after realizing I was the girl he had met at that party a couple months back and we started talking from there. He got my number after a few times of going back and forth on Twitter, and we started texting.
It was one night in early April that Jacob asked me on our first date. We’d been texting nonstop, literally typing paragraphs each text getting to know each other. Jacob planned for us to go to Java Haute, a little coffee shop in our college town (his hometown). We planned for 8:00, but at 7:59, no texts, no calls.. Is he standing me up?!?
A few minutes later, I hear a knock on my door. It’s him, smiling from ear to ear. I’ve said this SO many times to people, but I never expected him to park his car and walk all the way up to my apartment door to get me. I had been on dates with other guys, and every single one either texted me or called me when they were there. Something so simple meant so much to me. I knew my dad would like this when I told him.
That is when I knew Jacob was going to be someone very special to me.
We’ve talked about this first night so many times, but Jacob admitted that he had a song perfectly planned out for when I got in the car, so it would play the best part right when I got in. HOW ADORABLE, but hilarious!
So, we’re at Java Haute, hours pass, and we’re still sitting in the booth, totally soaked up into each other. Now, the workers are vacuuming around us, making it very obvious that it was time to go. We didn’t care. We still sat there and talked until they came up to us and told us that they were closed. We just wanted to spend every minute we possibly could sitting there, getting to know each other better.
He dropped me off at my apartment and I immediately called my mom. I NEVER did this before. I told her all about it and how he’s so amazing. I just went on and on about our first date. Jacob and I were texting when he got home and said how we need to see each other again. Like as soon as possible.
This is a weird feeling, could this dude be “the one?” Why do I smile EVERY TIME I think about him? I’ve only been on one date with him! WHO AM I BECOMING?!
I always joke around about how I’ve been obsessed with him the second I met him, but seriously, its true. And I’m not ashamed of it. We both have always been so compatible with each other — it’s crazy.
Fast-forward two weeks. It’s April 30th, and I’m at his house meeting his family. I had already met his dad at a baseball game. After meeting him, I knew I would love his family. Before dinner, I was standing down by the lake talking to his mom, and I looked up at Jacob talking with his dad and he smiled down at me.
We weren’t even officially boyfriend and girlfriend yet, but I just fell in love with his smile.
Later that night, when he dropped me off at my apartment, he asked me to be his girlfriend. I texted all my friends… like immediately.
When I first met Jacob, I kept saying that SOMETHING had to give. There’s no way a guy this perfect could exist. My family always jokes that I have the three-week rule: If any guy makes it past three weeks, it was something serious. But basically no guy made it past that; I would get bored or I would find out that he’s a jerk. And I’d be done with it.
When it got past that three-week mark, that’s when my dad knew he was going to be something special to my family. And he hadn’t even met him. Everything I told him made him love Jacob already.
From there, the paragraphs got longer, as well as our dates. We needed to know everything about each other. I just wanted to be with him. I grew to find out how kind he really was.
Okay, God, are you messing with me? How can I find someone so incredible? How did this happen? I thought I knew everybody at ISU. Something’s going to happen. Nothing ever works out this well for me.
But nothing changed. It just got better and better. He brought me food before our practices. Before classes, he would park his car outside my apartment window, just so I could open it when he walked by before baseball practice to say hi. We had the same friend group, so we all went out together on weekends. We would meet in the commons in between classes to get lunch. Most importantly, he supported everything I did. Our relationship put me on a level of happiness that I never knew was even possible.
As the weeks grew on, I knew I was starting to love him. This might be it—the real deal.
One night a few weeks later in May, Jacob got back late on a Sunday night from a baseball series and went to the library to study for a test that was the next day. I wasn’t really sure what kind of coffee he liked, but I wanted to bring him some anyway.
Does he like cream and sugar in it?
Should I get him a large?
What if he already has a coffee?
He was so thankful that I brought him one. Like seriously, he could have gotten one himself, but you’re this thankful?! That’s how wonderful he is. He didn’t get much studying done because once again, we were chatting up a storm for the next hour. Finally, I left so he could actually get work done. I thought about how THANKFUL he was for that coffee. Something so small!
I do love this guy.
School was now over. I was back home in Saint Charles, IL, but I had to be back in Terre Haute in early June for volleyball. It was May 16th, 2014. I know these dates because I’m looking at my Instagram account J. ISU baseball played at Bradley University, which was only a few hours from my house. My mom and I planned on going to his game. Unfortunately, my dad had to work, so he couldn’t go. This would be the first time my mom and Jacob would meet each other. After the game, he gave her a huge hug. It was like they had met each other before; my mom immediately loved him. We took our first picture together that night and I remember I had no idea what to make the caption (LAAAMMEEEE). We drove back home and I had a smile on the entire time.
I think he’s the one. I’ve never felt like this before! Ahhhh!!
It was May 30th, 2014, and it was the day my dad finally got to meet him. ISU was playing at Indiana University against Stanford in the NCAA Regional Tournament. Jacob was nervous to meet him, but he hit a double and had a diving catch in that game, or something crazy like that. I knew he would be excited he played well, especially for such a big game AND the fact that it was my dad’s first impression of him (even though my dad doesn’t think like that, but definitely was super impressed). Our families tailgated together before the game, and it was even more fun than I imagined.
I want to be in his family forever.
Our families met each other that day; it’s crazy to think back at this day as I stare at my wedding ring.
Now it’s June 8th, the night before Jacob left for Alaska, where he would be for the next three months playing summer ball. We were hanging out in my apartment, and that’s when he said those three HUGE words for the first time. I think I went into SVT (Nurse friends, eh-hem). My heart was going crazy.
That’s when I said I love you for the first time. I was already thinking Jacob is “the one.”
We both wanted to say it for a while, but we didn’t want to sound crazy because it was so early on. Jacob left for Alaska the next day, June 9th.
The next three months consisted of watching my boyfriend absolutely kill it up there. I wasn’t able to visit him, though. One, volleyball was taking up every moment of the summer, and two, I didn’t want to stay with him (well, I did, but it’s not the right thing to do). I’m a very traditional person, if you haven’t been able to tell with some of the posts I’ve written. So, we went three months with only Facetimes, calls, and texts.
Jacob has told me that he told his baseball friend, Scooter, while he was in Alaska that he was going to marry me. We were already talking about our future together, although we were only dating for a few months.
It was the happiest day ever when he came back from Alaska. We had the ENTIRE school year to be with each other—how freaking exciting?! One of the first days he came back, we had one of the BEST DAYS EVER.
It was August 17th. The day started with his little cousin’s party where we played whiffle ball. After that, he and I played putt-putt, got frozen yogurt, and then went to a movie.
At that point, I already knew I was going to marry him. We already had been talking about it for a few months. We had only been dating since late April.
The months went on, and our relationship continued to grow. The first day of the school year, we got Square Donuts together. (The next year, the first day of school rolled around, but Jacob had graduated. He had his friend bring square donuts to my house.) HOW. FREAKING. CUTE.
I was a junior and Jacob was a senior. As volleyball season went on, it proved to be a difficult season for me. There was one time in particular when I got home late from a tournament. I was already going to go over to his house, but when I did, I just broke down. I was completely sobbing. He was there and comforted me as I was talking and was probably 100% incoherent, but he continued to rub my back and talk me through it.
I already knew he was the one. And he is continuing to be the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.
I had never cried in front of any other boyfriend I had. It wasn’t the fact that I cried in front of him, so he had to be the one. It was the fact that I was comfortable enough to cry and he did everything he could to make me feel better. I’ve always been the tough one who doesn’t show emotions, but that didn’t even matter at that point. Time after time, Jacob proved that he was going to be the one that I would spend the rest of my life with.
He got down on one knee for me when we were only dating for a year and nine months. I was 21 and he was 24. It was the most magical day I could have ever imagined. The thought and detail he put into that day was something that still continues to blow my mind.
A week after he proposed to me, my grandmother died. And he continued to prove that he’s the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. No matter how many times I randomly started crying about it, he comforted me. A year and a half later, we said “I do.”
And now we’re married, and we share a sweet loft and have the cutest kitty ever.
For me, knowing he was “the one” came in phases. It wasn’t just one time that made me say, “Oh my gosh, I’m going to marry him.” I’m sure some people have that, though. From the first date, I knew something crazy was going on. But there were many things that he did to make me say that I’m going to marry him — and that was within the first few months of dating. I know he always talks about the first time that I was at his house, too. He has always explained the feeling he got when he saw his mom and me talking down by the lake. But I love our little love story more than anything. To me, our relationship is my own “relationship goals,” and I’ve always said that.
Was there one particular time where you knew you found “the one?” I want to hear all about it!